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’I was unlucky enough to have to work the late-night shift. This

meant I would stand behind the counter, sober as a judge, while the

customers came staggering in pissed or stoned.

’The stoned lot tended to be the funniest because they had terrible

munchies but took absolutely ages to work out exactly what they wanted.

They were also rather paranoid under the bright lights.’

But a career in the catering trade clearly wasn’t for Carloss, so she

landed a job as a media buyer at CIA Medianetwork.

These days she hangs out at Soho House, where they serve decent food and

the clientele isn’t generally stoned or drunk. Actually, on second

thoughts ...