Please, we implore you, read this story, and get a good look at this man, before making any rash decisions because it definitely hasn't worked out well for others who have tried the same trick.
In the past week alone, two lots of ne'er-do-wells have been on the receiving end of adland's vigilante hero. First, the industry's answer to Batman saw some hoodies trying to steal bikes near where he plays football so he locked them in a pitch with 15-foot high perimeter walls.
Then, just two days later Buonaguidi came across a miscreant trying to steal the agency's Mini from the Karmarama garage. Once the tea-leaf had tried to fob Buonaguidi off with a line about trying to find his dog, which didn't wash at all, the Italian Stallion gave him a good slapping.
But, these aren't isolated incidents of vigilantism. Last year, Diary reported a couple of attempted break-ins at the big man's Elephant & Castle residence.
To give you a flavour of the tale, here are a few choice quotes.
"I went out looking for the bastard in my car ... driving round for hours with a hammer on my lap", "I hit him very hard on the head with a shovel" and "I kicked him hard in the nuts".
Rumours of a movie loosely based on the life of the Hammersmith hard man (with the main character being played by Sylvester Stallone and Adam Woodyatt pencilled in to play the planning partner Sid McGrath) are, alas, being scotched by the agency.